What Does LOVE Mean To You?
By Lea Mishell
After over 40 years on this planet, I finally stopped living in Society’s box and I am now happily loving freely. I don't want to nor do I have to cheat on my husband. Our relationship is transparent and honest, one of the benefits of a polyamorous union. If an attractive woman catches my attention, I'm happy to discuss her with Hubby after I've taken the time to get to know her better. He does the same if he finds a potential girlfriend. I know. You're still trynna wrap your brain around the fact that we're married AND dating outside the marriage.
Do you want to know what I believe LOVE is? Love is allowing your partner the unrestricted freedom to love others while they're loving you, too. Hubby did that for me when I came out to him as bisexual after 5 years of marriage. Admittedly, I knew I was I wrong for keeping such a life changing secret but I couldn't live a lie any longer. My husband was the first person I came out to and his love hasn't diminished one ounce. In fact, I haven't lost anyone that I've come out to simply because they love me and want me to remain happy. My procrastination of coming out was partly due to the fact that I was afraid that not only would I lose dear loved ones thinking that they thought I was a living sin (too many times I've heard that homosexuality is a sin) but that I wouldn't find a man that could handle the fact that I only wanted one man and any woman that wanted me. Until Hubby, I never felt that vibe with anyone that said “tell THEM” so my apologies to past lovers for not knowing the full truth about me. I've always wanted a King and a Queen to share the rest of my life with. I have my King. Still searching for my Queen(s).
Ever since I announced that I'm openly polyamorous, the thing I find most interesting are the people that have something negative to say about loving freely. They say I'm greedy, trying to have my cake and eat it, too. Amazing that cheating is condoned but polyamory isn't. One major difference between cheating and polyamory is TRANSPARENCY. You don't lie or hide anything from your partner(s) in polyamory. When I find a potential girlfriend, I won't have to sneak away to see her or make her wait until I'm available for communication when I'm away from my husband. She will be just as respected as she is toward my husband and me. Loving freely doesn't mean sex with everyone. Sex doesn't even have to be involved to love someone. I have a few Loves (male and female) that I will never be sexually intimate with yet we still connect with loving energy.
To answer my question, in my own personal opinion, LOVE is embracing the positive spirit of another to make you both a better human being. And I love EVERYONE!!
If you would like to submit a question to SHARE THE LOVE, send an email to BlacktopiaBusiness@gmail.com with SHARE THE LOVE QUESTION in the subject line.
Polyamorous and striving to be Permanently Positive, Lea Mishell is a wife, mother of 3, and an author of urban fairy tales and erotica. Her works can be found at www.leanpub.com/b/TheLeaMishellCollection
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